They say a man can fix anything with duct tape but it can also be a blessing to a harried mom. See why I highly recommend it.
When my youngest daughter Joely was two and still in diapers, she really enjoyed fingerpainting. Unfortunately, she didn't like using paint or paper for her creations; instead she preferred to make her own fingerpaint—which she stored in her diaper—and painted earth-tone murals on the walls of her room.
This new hobby of hers, being unacceptable to our delicate sensitivities, forced us to devise an effective method with which to squelch this natural creativity of hers.
So what finally worked for us? Duct tape.
Each time we diapered her, we simply secured her diaper with a length of duct tape, making sure to put the end of the tape at the back of her diaper to make it less accessible to her curious hands. This wasn't a foolproof solution, but since the duct tape made it much more difficult for her to remove her diaper during her naptime, it sure cut down on her frequent forays into fingerpainting (how's that for alliteration?).
In memoriam of her attractive artwork, a couple years ago I sat down and composed a fictional poem illustrating some of our experiences. Names in the poem were changed to protect the guilty innocent.
Last week I nearly lost my mind!
My kids just fought and yelled and whined!
All three thought every toy unshareable;
The noise they made was quite unbearable.
They pulled my hair.
My nerves unraveled bit by bit.
But yesterday had gone all right—
(They’d only had eight minor fights.)
It seemed the major storm had passed
That maybe I’d have peace at last.
I longed to have one day of saneness—
A day of calmness.
But I just had to wait and see
What kind of day tomorrow would be.
So on to bed I went to pray
That dawn would bring a better day.
Alas, the morning came at last,
And sadly all my hopes were dashed.
My two-year-old filled up my purse
With chocolate syrup, and then immersed
My cashmere sweater in the sink,
Then colored all the walls hot pink.
And—oh!—what’s more, the little stinker
(Thinking he was such a thinker)
Made a homemade fishing pole,
And used as bait his hamster, Lowell,
Then cast him in the toilet bowl!
Of course while this was going on
I didn’t notice little John
Was decorating Jenny’s face
With butter, jam, and mint toothpaste.
Then Jenny thought that she’d be funny
And filled the VCR with honey.
Then after that she found some shears
And cut her hair from ear to ear.
But that was nothing when I saw
That as a great and last hurrah,
My little two-year-old—my Paul—
Had painted pictures on the wall,
But brush and paint he hadn’t used;
Instead his diaper he’d removed,
And with its contents he’d proceeded
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